Jealous Bitches

You know what, guys? Just shut up already about The Hills. You're all just jealous. It's not their fault that everyone wants to be them. I mean, come on, Heidi and Lauren are practically self-made celebrities. They worked their way to the top just like the rest of the lighting guys, Steadi-Cam operators, and directors on set. It's not their fault that some 22 year old P.A. got hired to follow them around with a hair light for 18 hours/day. It's yours for not applying to be that guy.

I don't care what you say...The Hills is quality programming. It tells the real-life stories of teens and the hardships of what it's like to live on the Sunset Strip. Finding somewhere to eat, choosing guys based on facial hair patterns, and selecting an accountant that's not “all old and boring” can eat up a lot of time. I mean, it ain't all Chanel and BMW's – one time on the show Lauren had to ride in a Toyota...and the air conditioning didn't work. Talk about a rough day...yeesh.

I mean, it's not like you guys couldn't be little go-getting entrepreneurs as well. I'm sure Audrina, Whitney, LC, and Heidi sat down one day and had a pre-production meeting about how much people envy their lives. I know...how could you not, right? I mean, with the exception of eight guys in black following them around all day with boom-mics and HD cams, it's perfectly realistic. Of course, that is if someone doesn't mess up their line – then you'll need to re-shoot Lauren's over-the-shoulder shot. It's going to be a bitch to resync that with the other cam, though. Oh...and there was one episode where they had to stop because Spencer got trashed and crushed his lav mic, but besides that....I mean, the conversations are real. Well...maybe not all of them on camera, but when you see “The Hills: Behind the Scenes”....that's when you get to see the real stuff they couldn't show.

So stop judging them. It's not their fault that their reality is so much cooler than yours. They earned it...and their better actors than you'll ever be. So take your jealousy and shove it. There's a 73% chance re-runs are on right now, so I guess I've got somewhere to be.